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1. July 2006 New Demographic Newsletter at New Demographic - an anti-racism training company on 24 Sep 2006 at 5:31 pm

   […] June 12th was the 39th anniversary of the Loving v. Virginia decision, which legalized interracial marriage across the country. It was a huge milestone in the civil rights movement, but Carmen posits that uncritical celebrations of “Loving Day” undermine the discrimination that interracial couples still face today. […]

Comments

1. Jenn wrote:

   Thanks for the links!!

   Posted 21 Jun 2006 at 6:25 pm ¶

2. Sabrina wrote:

   It’s a shame how the media ignores one of the most IMPORTANT Civil Rights decisions of the 20th Century! Even NPR dropped the ball this year. Instead of talking about Loving Day, they ran a very sensationalist piece about a movie called “Tired Black Man” which criticizes interracial relationships! I wrote them about their gaffe, but apparently was ignored. Yet, every single June you can’t turn a corner without some mention about Gay pride. Even in 2006, if you judge by what the media chooses to cover, it seems like it’s OK to be gay, but NOT ok to be part of an interracial couples.

   Posted 22 Jun 2006 at 7:42 am ¶

3. Lyonside wrote:

   Sabrina: I think it’s mostly because for anyone not in an IR (and for some fortunate people in them), interracial dating is not a hot-button issue, it’s seen as played out, as passe’, as not a problem unless you’re an inbred frothing-at-the-mouth racist.

   I love NPR, but they are a ratings slave like every other media outlet - maybe not in the Neilson sense, but in the sense of having to stay fresh and current so that their listeners support the stations. However, gay-related issues are still hot-button and unresolved, so it gets more press.

   Now, personally, I love the idea of Loving Day. Maybe that’s because my parents ran into issues as late as the mid 1980s while traveling (minor crap - being stopped by security who didn’t believe they were together - you’d think the matching tennis rackets would’ve given it away). Or maybe because I have coworkers older than I am who never knew that miscegenation laws were actually on the books (they just thought it was one of those unspoken social rules *eyeroll*).

   I agree, however, that the website seems to take the lowest common denominator, and despite being started by a hapa, seems to not be reaching out to all IR couples, or even the challenges faced today. I was tempted to go to NYC this year, to check it out, but I decided to hold off until next year. I’m hoping the site maybe takes the constructive criticism and revamps the focus a bit.

   Posted 22 Jun 2006 at 8:09 am ¶

4. Changeseeker wrote:

   Well-written. Well-discussed. Important. Good for you.

   Posted 22 Jun 2006 at 10:50 am ¶

5. Stephanie B. wrote:

   What I don’t like is that they portray black men/white women relationships as being progressive without pointing out the history of past interracial relationships and its dynamics.

   So are we going to ignore the whole purpose of antimiscegenation laws, which is more about protecting white privilege and wealth than it is about anything else. Ignore Strom Thurmond’s relationship with a young Black housekeeper in the twenties? How about the much-publicized case of Alice Rhinelander and how it tore the couple apart, literally.

   Also, the media seldom gave the Lovings themselves any credit. It was a black woman/white man couple who challenged the Virginia antimiscegenation laws, but you wouldn’t hear about it much in the media.

   Furthermore, I think the motivation of the “progressive” BM/WF relationship is to cover up the past on the part of mainstream society. What say you?

   Stephanie

   http://journals.aol.com/jenjer6/StephaniesJournal/

   Posted 22 Jun 2006 at 11:41 am ¶

6. Marsha wrote:

   Some of the testimonials are disturbing. I suppose I’m just sick to death of all these white people talking about how “enriched” they have been by being in relationship with someone of another culture or race as if they are devoid of any culture themselves. Hell, maybe they are- being so far removed from their European heritage. I’ve been to Ireland 3 times and the so-called Irish-Americans are always there trying to claiming their Irish-ness when they have about as much in common with an Irish person as they would with an Iranian.

   I personally, am sick of meeting people who expect me to “enrich” them about my Peruvian side of the family as if they can’t pick up a book and read about the culture themselves or take an interest in other parts of the world besides the U.S.A. Like it’s our job to “educate” them. It seems they expect to co-opt some authentic piece of culture by consuming food, wearing ethnic prints, or f*cking someone. I suppose I’m really bothered by the fact that no matter what, I’m still looked as as “the other”. And, yes, as Jenn pointed out, it seems like the commentators are really into patting themselves on the back. “Hey, I’m dating someone of another race! Look at ME! I’m so open-minded and cultured!!!”

   Posted 22 Jun 2006 at 1:36 pm ¶

7. bertie wrote:

   Stephanie–I’m a little confused by your post. Are you saying that BM/WF coupling is seen as more progressive than other interracial couplings? If so, I do not agree. I think–based on the comments on the Loving website–all of the couples felt they were progressive. And, at least in my circles, BM are accused of self-hate, weakness, etc if the date WF–whereas BW are merely responding to the lack of dateable BM if they date WM (which is equally insulting to BM and WM). Neither seems very progressive to me. If I have mischaracterized the point of your post, I apologize.

   Posted 23 Jun 2006 at 9:35 am ¶

8. Stephanie B. wrote:

   No,

   What I’m trying to say is that mainstream media has the tendency to celebrate black male/white female pairings at the expense of all others.

   Posted 23 Jun 2006 at 12:07 pm ¶

9. Stephanie B. wrote:

   Two, such declarations are a way to cover up the past interracial relationships between WM/BW. The media doesn’t want to be reminded of them because it’s uncomfortable and it unsettles their stupid colorblind, progressive ideology concerning interracial relationships.

   Maybe if we honestly study interracial relationships before 1960, a different picture emerges from that of the official mainstream propaganda that BM/WW relationships are the so called epitome of progress.

   Stephanie

   Posted 23 Jun 2006 at 12:12 pm ¶

10. Paul G. wrote:

    I linked to this from Jen and Carmen’s recent e-newsletter and I think they do amazing work and I support them, but I rarely participate in the dialog because quite frankly, I feel like it’s an “anger generator.” There is a lot to be angry about, for sure, and all issues need watchdogs (and I am one myself for a different issue) but how do you escape from that anger when you can always find racism and stupidity? I, for one, plan on clinging to my “asinine utopian notions” because I need to find positivity somewhere on this planet. I think there is a lot of positivity that is overlooked by this post.

    First of all, I don’t see how you can deny that when people of different races learn to live together, that’s a good thing. Right? (I don’t just mean marriage and love, I also mean desegregation and community.) If you are an older Asian couple, grew up around Asians your whole life, harbored whatever stereotypes you harbored about non-Asians…and then your child married a person who is not Asian, and you get to know that person, and that person gets to know you, and even if there is tension (and in what family is there no tension?) love and understanding develops…doesn’t that break stereotypes? Isn’t that a good thing? I’m not saying that couples should get married in ORDER to break stereotypes, but isn’t that a positive byproduct of interracial marriages? And can’t those of us who grew up watching Star Trek and reading Science Fiction (yes, I’m a geek) extrapolate a little on the notion that more interracial marriages leads to better understanding between the races leads to the weakening of racism?

    I’m not naive enough to think that increasing interracial marriages is the only factor involved or that it can happen anytime soon, or even in our lifetimes…but without utopian notions, what’s OUR GOAL here? I believe in trying to repair the world, and if I sound like a hippie, so be it. And I think interracial marriages can often help break racial barriers for the extended families involved, and if that sounds naive, then so be it. It’s not why I married interracially, but I feel encouraged when I hear that interracial marriages are on the rise because maybe my future children will have more mixed-race friends than I did growing up, and they will hopefully live in a less racist world than I did (and I believe they will).

    I find it hard to believe that you don’t have your own utopian dreams, and I’d like to hear more of them. A leader has to also be a dreamer. See MLK. He had lots of “asinine utopian notions,” and we’re still quoting them today, though we haven’t gotten there yet.

    I also feel like there is a positive, constructive solution beyond simple criticism of the Loving Day party: organize something beforehand. Maybe all Ken wants to do is hang out and party; maybe he is not the political organizer that you are. There’s nothing wrong with social events built around the commonality of being mixed race (see: Swirl). If however you believe this is the occasion for politics over partying, then next year I think you should lead a rally at City Hall and then we all march up to the party together. That will combine your political activism and his party-organizing, and I will absolutely attend, and would be happy to contribute my time to help.

    I see your point about not using erotic images to promote Loving Day. But it was a party, and he was trying to attract young people. If this was about politics, perhaps it would be much more powerful to use images of children. Or a group of various races and ethnicities. On the other hand, if black on white skin really does “shock and titillate” (though I don’t really see it), and the goal is to be in-your-face about interracial marriages, then maybe that is indeed the best example even though it’s the rarest coupling, demographically. The gay-pride movement says “we’re here, we’re queer, what are you going to do about it.” Let’s go plaster Ken’s postcards in Alabama or somewhere (Chicago, perhaps, where I was yelled at on the street for being in an interracial relationship); sometimes shock value is a necessary tool in breaking stereotypes or gaining civil rights.

    If it’s really shocking to someone that a black guy is kissing a white woman, I’d want to keep that image in front of their face until it wasn’t shocking anymore.

    Posted 06 Jul 2006 at 10:59 am ¶

11. Paul G. wrote:

    ps - I am not suggesting above that “the intersection between sex and race are devoid of the tribulations of sexism and racism.” However, I believe that more interaction, more relationships, more communication, is better than not. Interracial marriage forces the issue, and that’s a good thing, IMHO.

    Posted 06 Jul 2006 at 11:07 am ¶

12. Ken Tanabe wrote:

    Hello everyone - I wrote a response directly to MMW and they encouraged me to post it as a response to this thread. The full text is included below. Thanks to everyone who has posted so far. It’s great to hear your thoughts, and I hope you’ll keep them coming.

    ———————

    Dear Mixed Media Watch,

    I am writing in response to your posting on 6/21/06 entitled “Why uncritical celebration of Loving Day makes no sense.” In this posting you made statements regarding the idea of Loving Day, the celebrations, and the campaign materials available through LovingDay.org. I wish to clarify the mission of the Loving Day project, and the spirit in which the celebration and the project materials were created.

    First, I wish to thank you for your honest opinions about the campaign. Thoughtful criticisms are a great benefit, and are therefore welcome and appreciated. I also appreciate amount of detail in this posting and your recent writings, which has been far richer than anything than anything that you have been kind enough to provide in years since I began working on this project.

    To address your criticisms, I would like to draw inspiration from the campaign against breast cancer. This campaign, although more serious, serves as a great example of how campaigns work. On one level, curing cancer is an extremely complex medical issue. Only a small percentage of people are qualified to fight cancer directly through scientific research. No one disputes the incredible value of this work and the deep specific knowledge that is required.

    However, there is more to cancer than science. On another level, breast cancer is something that touches all of us as people. This is where the campaign comes in. One of the most visible aspects of that campaign are the breast cancer walks. The average participant in these walks is not a doctor or a scientist. However, they know the basics. They also know how cancer has touched them or someone they love. Most importantly, they are working to be part of the solution. The fight against breast cancer is stronger thanks to the participation of regular people.

    Race is a complex topic within history and sociology (among other disciplines), just as breast cancer is a complex topic within science and medicine. Some people have a Ph.D. in these subjects, and others like you devote a considerable portion of their adult lives to study and activism. There are a lot of people out there that have never heard of Loving v. Virginia and have never thought much about interracial couples or multiethnic identity. I was one of these people, even though my parents are an interracial couple.

    This is where Loving Day comes in. The purpose of celebrating is to raise awareness of the Loving decision, just like the walks raise awareness of the fight against breast cancer. While the Loving decision alone does not encompass the hundreds of years of history that predate it, it does serve as an appropriate starting point from our perspective in time. The campaign is about making the Loving decision common knowledge like Brown v. Board of Education, which also serves as a starting point of a much larger conversation.

    Laws and court decisions are at the core of the campaign. Loving Day was named after a Supreme Court decision, and sections of LovingDay.org are devoted to making this information accessible. People may have differing opinions about the value of laws and court cases, but knowledge of this material enables all of us to have a more productive discussion.

    There is more to racism than law, just as there is more to cancer than science. We as people use stories to share our experiences and to learn from each other. LovingDay.org includes personal stories as a way of bringing the legacy of the past into a modern context. They also bring a human dimension to the conversation that laws and court cases cannot. People can relate to these stories; they are a popular part of the website and we receive new ones every day.

    Loving Day is a campaign that has a visual identity. Just as the fight against breast cancer has the pink ribbon, Loving Day has the heart with a shield around it. Both campaigns also make use of images to bring a message to a large audience. All of the Loving Day campaign materials are created with volunteer labor and donated equipment and facilities. If they are not all inclusive, it is only through a lack of resources. I should mention that there is a new postcard/ecard of an Asian woman with a Caucasian man which is, as you mentioned in your posting, one of the most common pairings.

    Your posting was particularly critical of the kissing imagery, which you characterized as “sucking face.” You also described it as being “fetishistic” and “meant to shock and titillate.” Kissing can be interpreted as sexual, but to be fair, it is also something we do with those we love. People kiss on their wedding day. People kiss in public. Close-lipped kissing may have been pornographic at point in history, but it has been quite acceptable in media for the past few decades. Furthermore, all of the couples in the campaign are real. The couple you referred to has been together for years; I had dinner with them last night. You are certainly entitled to your interpretation, but I wonder how many others share that interpretation with you.

    Loving Day, like most things, is imperfect. It does not encompass the full range of the interracial/multiracial experience, nor does it claim to. I do not believe that any single entity could. Loving Day is not about a website, a postcard, a single event, or an organization. Loving Day does not claim directly or through suggestion that interracial couples are inherently praiseworthy, but it does does praise the overturning of racist laws.

    Loving Day is an idea that belongs to everyone who wants to be a part of it. Loving Day is about awareness, education, and fighting discrimination. Loving Day is a small but growing part of a larger community.

    There were seven public celebrations nationwide this year, each one hosted by a different organization. There were also many celebrations that people hosted at home for friends and family. Each one is different. If you or anyone else has ideas about Loving Day, I would encourage you to contribute in any way you can. If you have a specific vision, you can host your own event. You can also help us with our event and our work throughout the year.

    You have always had an open invitation to participate in Loving Day. I am grateful for your past efforts to help publicize the New York event. I believe that your knowledge could contribute greatly to the project in a direct way. If the celebrations are not educational enough, then please attend and take an active role in educating our guests. I’m sure that the 500 people at the New York celebration would love to learn from you, myself included. You could also sponsor your own educational event around Loving Day. These are just a few ways that you make a positive contribution, all of which would far more productive than a critical and public blog posting. Please don’t let small things like a photograph stand in your way. Such details can be worked out with an open and direct dialogue.

    I hope you can see us as part of the same fight against discrimination. We all put in a lot of time, effort, and money for our cause. We all do this work in addition to our daytime responsibilities. We should find ways to be more supportive of one another’s work. Many people and organizations are already preparing for next year’s 40th anniversary events. I hope that you choose to be an active part of it, and I am looking forward speaking with you in the near future.

    Sincerely,

    Ken Tanabe.

    Posted 10 Jul 2006 at 6:39 pm ¶

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