Comments on: Another “something new” trend piece

By: Bohwe

Bohwe — Thu, 11 May 2006 01:09:32 +0000

As a black woman, who is of multiethnic background. I feel that it’s about time black women stop being afraid to date outside their race, because of black people with no life, feel. So, what that there are sites dedicated to black women and white men hooking up, or websites dedicated to black/white love. Many times black women and white men aren’t in the same environment, but are physically attracted to each other, so the logical thing is to set up a meeting place for them. How can you meet the men or women you are attracted to if, you don’t know where they are? And as far as the whole fetish thing, it’s not a fetish , it’s a preference, or basically, a physical attraction. Hey, it’s not a fetish, that I’m only attracted to men who aren’t black. That’s my thing. I love men with the exotic look, such as Middle Eastern men, Asian men, Pacific Islanders, even white boys. It becomes a fetish when you take your attraction and make it about some odd sexual freakish behavior. I’m attracted to the latin guys at my school, is that a fetish, or natural, because I’m human.

By: Rachael

Rachael — Tue, 09 May 2006 15:48:08 +0000

I am a black woman who met my boyfriend on an interracial dating website…the purpose for me going on there was actually not because of a “fetish”…but its out in the open that we are openminded about race…unlike “other” dating websites you are not so sure if that person of another race would be open to dating you…but on these sites it is welcome, comfortable and safe to approach someone. I am extremely happy with my choice, and have dated all races of men (mainly black though) but i just happen to get to a point in my life where i decided i would not cut off the potential of true love based on race.

By: Daniel

Daniel — Thu, 27 Apr 2006 19:58:01 +0000

Interesting responses! Mr Guy, very funny! I would agree with you though. There is no sense in limiting yourself. I usually only draw the line at dangerously insane. Then again, it can be hard to be sure before it’s too late. I’ll never get the whole speed dating thing. It makes me shudder just to think about it. I’m not knocking anybody for doing it, I just don’t have the strength for it myself. I prefer the slow, painful, old fashioned rejection over anything with the word speed in it.
Now, as far as black women dating white men being a new trend, that makes me laugh. Yes, there are some black woman who will date somebody from another race without introducing him to friends and family out of fear. There are also a lot of black women who have no such fears. This is most certainly not something new! This speed dating thing, though…ouch, it hurts my head!

By: D.Angeli

D.Angeli — Thu, 27 Apr 2006 01:31:18 +0000

“I don’t know, You don’t understand”
I think I actually said that to a white boy that I liked in high school. But I did wonder if he was only interested because he wanted to show his friends that he could get a black girl. I’m not saying all white men are like that but I’ve always felt I’ve had to be cautious around them.
As for speed dating…I don’t know. I’ve never done it but whatever floats your boat.

By: gatamala

gatamala — Wed, 26 Apr 2006 14:52:58 +0000

I have no problem w/ dating white men.

I DO have a problem w/ someone’s creepy choklit fantasy like this speed dating. BLEECCCH!

By: bertie

bertie — Wed, 26 Apr 2006 14:31:14 +0000

ohh..ok. I got thrown off by the “I think this is good” comment followed by the exploring options” comment. It seemed like you were saying that the white men only speed dating was good because it was a way for black women to explore options.

By: Unlisted

Unlisted — Wed, 26 Apr 2006 00:39:38 +0000

Bertie:

I wasn’t referring to the speed dating

I’m not saying that they should go from black men only to white men only. “Exploring Options” means being open to other men besides blacks. Not closing the door completely on one or the other

By: merq

merq — Tue, 25 Apr 2006 23:15:39 +0000

hats off to bertie

By: bertie

bertie — Tue, 25 Apr 2006 23:00:33 +0000

Unlisted–as a blackman I have no problem with black women “broadening their horizon.” But how is going to a white male only speed dating event broadening. Its just changing one racial limitation for another. It would be different if it was multi-racial event. I don’t see anything wrong with the speed dating per se–but it is what it is. The participants are using race as the predominate factor in limiting their dating pool.

By: brad

brad — Tue, 25 Apr 2006 20:11:29 +0000

I think that some people are interested in people from a fetish-perspective (looking for a China Doll, gag!). However, some people do like blondes, brunettes, etc. I find brunettes more attractive than blondes. Some people like darker skin, etc. So, that’s normal. It gets icky when it’s a fantasy perspective that drives someone’s desire because that dehumanizes and objectifies a person into a sexual plaything: black whore; China doll; hot tamale; blonde bimbo; etc.

Has anyone noticed the blonde fetish in Latin America? It’s pretty yucky, too, because it’s based off sexism and racism.

As for the speed dating, I think it’s not horrible at all. What if you are interested in dating someone from an ethnic group to whom you don’t have in your circle of acquaintances or colleagues? I can’t begrudge someone for curiosity.

I’ve known some Asian women who date Caucasian men exclusively because they find Asian men unattractive and just want a white guy. It’s kinda sad because they admit that it’s almost brainwashing since they feel that they’ve been taught that white men are better looking.