Mixing masala*
RK
For a culture that (unfortunately) does not exactly embrace inter-caste, nevermind interracial marriages, I was thrilled to see this month’s Little India magazine run a story by Zofeen Maqsood about the growing number of young, successful Indian women who are choosing to marry men of non-Indian descent. Usually it is Indian men who are afforded the opportunities to travel abroad, meet non-Indian women, date and perhaps marry, so it is unique circumstance that Gen X Indian women are trending– even in small elite numbers– to interracial marriage.
Kiran Mazumdar Shaw, chief executive officer of Biocon and the richest woman in India, who has known her American husband John Shaw for more than a decade, married him some six years ago. “There wasn’t a bit of apprehension in my mind. In fact it won’t be wrong if I say that John is much more Indian than I am. I never felt that our cultures are different or our geographical boundaries have the might to separate us.”
Professional dancer, Shovana Narayan says: “Difference of opinion, petty fights are tantamount to happen in any marriage. It bears really no relation that just because we come from different countries we will lock horns more often. All relationships are unpredictable. I realized that early on.”
The article superficially examines the question of WHY this trend is surfacing, and many of those interviewed say that men outside of the Indian culture are more supportive and accepting of women’s success in their careers, and the ambition that gets them there.
While all of the women profiled in Maqsood’s article are celebrities, I believe that as younger women observe interracial marriages becoming more commonplace in media and received with less threats of cardiac arrest from every auntie on the block, they may consider it a viable option for themselves.
Dr. Sandeep Vohra, senior consultant psychiatrist at Delhi’s Apollo Hospital says: “Today’s generation is not only well versed with practices of people around the globe, but is often well traveled. A sense of healthy departure from the strict codes of conduct is therefore expected.”
Personally, I hope for this acceptance to come, and not a moment too soon. In a culture where fairness-of-skin is highly desired, it is ironically rejected if one is of mixed-blood. I look forward to the day when those of us who are “Indian and…” will not be made to feel Less Than for our multiculturalism.
[*masala: a blend of multiple spices]
wayne alexander wrote:
So are they marrying irregardless of race or because of the mixed race phenomena …In South Africa mixed race marriages seem to be acceptable if an Indian girl marries a white man … but all other options are less acceptable … i wonder why?
Posted 27 Jul 2005 at 6:11 am ¶
Renu wrote:
The impression I got was that women of this generation were awakening to the possibility that their ideal mate may well not be of the same race. I don’t think it was fetishism or an It thing.
Posted 27 Jul 2005 at 2:38 pm ¶
Raj wrote:
Most of the Indian women who get into this just have a fetish if white skin, and when it is over they realize what they have got themselves into. The white man is not faithful even to his own white women, which is exemplified with around 60% divorce rate in the west, let alone to be expected to be faithful to an Indian women. The statistics speak for themselves, most of these relationhsips end in bitter divorces or seperation. I do think that love is possible, without any prejeduice, however, I really do have doubts that a white man can be with just one woman all his life. He is bound to stray, and once his own fetish for dark skin fades, he will look for greener pastures in a new territory. Even most western white women agree with this quite well.
Posted 31 Jul 2005 at 6:32 pm ¶
Renu wrote:
are you a western white woman that you can speak for them?
perhaps the initial attraction does wear off, and perhaps at closer look two individuals are not able/willing to bridge the cultural divide and grow distant from their differences.
perhaps 2 people can truly love each other and be happy as just People.
I don’t subscribe to sweeping generalizations, but surely you can’t paint people with such broad strokes without the realisation that ALL humans, in any grouping, ethnicity, gender, hobby… whatever… they will all have flaws, they will all hurt each other, and no one is a devil or a saint for it. Attributing it to race is only hurtful, short-sighted, and counterproductive.
Posted 02 Aug 2005 at 2:06 pm ¶
Mike wrote:
It just sounds like Raj is jealous.
Posted 24 Sep 2005 at 10:51 pm ¶
anonymous wrote:
It seems like Raj has been rejected by a white woman. Therefore he is channelling his hatred for white men by demoralizing them. Poor Raj. Get over it. You will never be white.
Posted 28 Feb 2006 at 3:19 pm ¶